stepping up.

“Imagine all the people who would have been affected if Esther never stepped up. Okay, now imagine all the people who will be affected if you never do.”

– from @shespeaksministries Instagram, written by @worthyofgrace
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‭⬇️Devo ✍🏼 @worthyofgrace . Esther a woman who was not born into royalty, but was chosen by God to be queen to save the Jewish people from annihilation. Her story is a lot like ours, once an orphan, but now chosen to do the work of her Heavenly Father. Esther is easy to relate to. When Mordecai (her cousin, but he also adopted her, and raised her), came to Esther one night and said, that Haman has order the death of the Jews – her people. Esther was saddened by this news, and Mordecai encouraged her to speak up for the voice-less. Sometimes, we sin by what we know to do, but yet, we do not do it. Speaking up for truth and justice in the midst of great fear had Esther dreading this assignment. It’s easy to want to back down, because of fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of can God really use me, fear that the whole plan will be utterly chaotic and ruined if you do it, so you back down. Well, despite all her fears, Esther called for a fast, and God responded with great favor for her and the Jews. Is God calling you to do something hard? To speak up, to step into your purpose, to pursue your Heavenly Father’s business? Remember Jesus always went about healing people and doing good – ACTS 10:38 (I love that about him)! . You were made for such a time as this! It’s time to step out you are worth it! You and God got this! #shespeaksfire . Esther 4:14:“If you keep quiet at a time like this, deliverance and relief for the Jews will arise from some other place, but you and your relatives will die. Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?”” ‬

A post shared by She Speaks Ministries 🗣🔥 (@shespeaksministries) on

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My coworkers all decided to wear red, white, and blue to work today since tomorrow we’ll be off, and the Fourth of July is this Saturday. If you’re not aware: with the recent events surrounding racial tension, and the increase of racial awareness, most Black people have decided to celebrate Juneteenth instead of July 4th for Independence Day, declaring the Fourth of July a “white holiday.”

So, all week I’d debated on whether or not I should participate because I definitely wasn’t planning on celebrating the fourth, and I didn’t want to symbolize that I was with what I was wearing, but I also knew that, being the only Black woman in my workplace, I’d probably be making people feel uncomfortable, and questioning me as to why I didn’t dress in the said colors. And since I work in a preschool, I didn’t need or want parents complaining to my boss about what I was wearing either.

Because I decided this morning to wear my “I Can’t Breathe” shirt instead.

I had so many thoughts: Would someone say I was trying to be political by wearing it? Would my boss be angry with me? Is wearing this shirt inappropriate for work? But why would it be? Why am I questioning if I can wear this shirt when I’m able to wear almost anything to work and be 100% fine? (I knew the answer to the last question)

I resolved that, if my boss told me to take it off, I’d just take it off and just have a different shirt on, but I would not wear the color combos red, white, and blue to work today. I was honestly sort of nervous…so much so that I texted the co-teacher I’m working with this summer about it to get her thoughts…not her permission. She fully supported my decision, and even said she wouldn’t wear the designated colors too so I wouldn’t be alone.

As I prayed this morning and prepared my heart for the day, the quote above popped into my mind. I’d read it yesterday, and was touched at how powerful it was, and I was grateful that it could resonate with me this morning. (If you don’t know about the story of Esther, definitely check her out in the Bible. Such an amazing woman!) What if I wore the shirt and was able to start conversations with my co-workers about what was happening, not just in our city, but in our country as a whole? Granted, we’ve been back to work for weeks now…I honestly feel like some of them are avoiding the topic of racial tension because they don’t want to say the wrong things or offend me. But I’d rather them say something wrong and I be able to help them understand why than to not talk about it at all. Because the reality is, they work with ME…I, a Black woman, am going to be with them five days a week, and that right there is looking and being with racial tension – what to say, what not to say. To touch my hair or not to. To make comments about certain situations, or to just be silent. I see all of that stuff, and I take notes, and act accordingly.

If I chose to just give in and wear what everyone else was wearing, I felt like I’d just be giving up, and not speaking up. And while I shouldn’t be the only person that my co-workers go to for Black questions, I feel a responsibility as the only Black woman there to be the voice for the Black community that is rarely if not at all represented in that area.

The result?

I went to work, had a co-worker ask what my shirt said, I showed her, and she said, “Oh, okay!” Had a few other co-workers see my shirt and they silently kept it pushing.

Feeling like I had to explain myself (which I shouldn’t have to, but anyways…), I talked to the same co-worker who asked me what my shirt said about why I wasn’t wearing red, white, and blue, and she fully understood, and said she wasn’t offended, and didn’t know why others would be.

When my co-teacher came into work a little later without any red, white, or blue on, my boss asked her why she wasn’t wearing any, yet she didn’t ask me when she fully saw that I wasn’t wearing any either.

Apparently, she also made a comment out loud again about how one of the kids in our class looked cute wearing the patriotic colors, but my co-teacher (not me) wasn’t matching.

It sort of breaks my heart that no one really asked me more about my shirt, or tried to ask my opinion on what was happening, or even ask how I was doing (because since everything started in late May/early June, no one from my job has asked except my co-teacher) but it also doesn’t surprise me. I just wish people wouldn’t be afraid to have racial conversations that could possibly expose things they didn’t know weren’t okay to say, do, believe, etc. And maybe they are having those conversations outside of work, which is great! I’d just like to know that that information is being translated to EVERY area of their lives, NOT JUST to their black friends outside of work, or their black family members.

I will say that I’m extremely grateful for my co-teacher…she stepped up for me today, and I cannot thank her enough! It felt good to have someone stand with me in solidarity today. And even through these first few weeks of work, she’s been pro-active about asking me questions and talking about the racial events that are happening, and I believe it is not a coincidence, but a full-on blessing that we were assigned to be with each other this summer.

Just felt like I had to share that. There is SO much work to be done to undo all the racial injustice our country has held tightly to, and I’m grateful that the protests haven’t died down, and pray that the conversations everywhere don’t die down either. While my gesture of wearing a “I Can’t Breathe” shirt to work may seem small, it opened my eyes to just how deep the fear of being called out about my race is rooted in me. And in no way would I say that I’m ashamed to be Black! But I know that I myself need to shake out of being afraid to be a topic of conversation, or to have conversations with people I’m with on a daily basis, or with my friends or family.

I continue to pray that all my Black brothers and sisters would be able to step up wherever they are: in their friend circles, in their families (whether blood or in-laws), in their workplaces, etc. I pray for strength and courage. I pray for peace. And I pray that the spirit of racism would cower at the Holy Spirit, who favors no person because of their race or background, but lives within WHOEVER believes in Jesus Christ and His death, resurrection, and return.

BLACK BROTHERS AND SISTERS: What are some ways you’ve had to step up for yourself, either recently or in the past, in regards to your race? Where do you find the most support? Where do you find the most tension?

BLACK ALLIES: Have you been inspired by a Black friend, family member, co-worker, significant other, etc. who has stood up in the face of racism, or in just the isolation of being Black in a particular place or circumstance? How did you respond? Did you learn anything that you’ll take with you as the fight for racial equality and justice continues?

Mishy 🦋💙

through His Eyes.

A couple of nights ago as I lied in bed, trying to get to sleep, I began praying for all the things I’d been so focused on last week. All my frustrations, all my concerns…and I’m not sure if I dozed off a little bit, or what, but all I know is, my mind began to think and then sing this song…

Just take a look through my eyes.
There’s a better place somewhere out there.
Just take a look through my eyes.
Everything changes, you’ll be amazed what you find,
When you look through my eyes.

Guys…if you know, you know. That’s a song from the Disney movie Brother Bear. 😂 And while it’s comical that that song popped in my head, and I hadn’t seen that movie since I was probably around ten years old, the words were significant enough for me to shoot my eyes open, and lie in bed to briefly think about them.

Not only that, but I prayed, asking God to help me remember the next morning that this song was in my mind the night before. And it brought me peace. Because I wasn’t think about the song and how it related to the movie, I was thinking about how it related to my life.

Here we are smack dab in the middle of the week, probably still reflecting on the events of last week, and even the events of the last few months – coronavirus pandemic and the racial pandemic our country has been in, but has now resurfaced due to recent murders of black people. And it’s easy to look at things through so many perspectives, and then react to those perspectives in anger, hurt, sadness, etc. Not to mention that lately, it’s been personally easy for me to see myself in a perspective that isn’t uplifting, and then I sometimes react in the ways I named above.

This is just a reminder to see ourselves and our lives through God’s perspective, through His eyes. How would He want us to perceive the things happening in our world? How would He want us to react to it all? What would He want us to say when we have opportunities to speak up? What would He not want us to say when we have opportunities to speak?

Asking all these questions is like the deeper version of “WWJD?” (“What would Jesus do?”), and as a Christian in this broken world, I have to ask myself these things before I respond to anything that’s happening around me because I’m not just representing myself, I’m representing Christ as well. That doesn’t mean I won’t make mistakes, because I’ve definitely had some wrong reactions or said some wrong things due to just viewing things in a selfish way, but it doesn’t mean I should just give up and not work on it at all.

So, I just encourage my fellow Christian brothers and sisters to look at the world and to look at your life through His eyes, and act accordingly. What do you see, and how can you respond in a way that closely resembles how Christ would?

Also, don’t be surprised if God speaks to you through something like a Disney song. It may sound strange, but sometimes it takes something as simple, and what might seem somewhat silly, to grab our attention, and to have us hear His voice.

Mishy 🦋💛

intentions.

It’s June 1st, which means for me, a new color for the month (even though I’m a little behind on the #BrownSkinGirlProject, it doesn’t hurt to have a few more brown girls on my feed, especially in the times we’re in right now).

Today wasn’t just a change of color for my social media though; it was a change of color in my spirit. With everything going on in the world, we all still each have our own personal battles we deal with, and honestly, mine have been pretty heavy and consistent. You may think, What? You don’t seem like it… but it’s true. I may not portray on social media my internal struggles, but I still have them.

And as I cleaned my entire apartment (I’m talking…from bathroom to bedroom, the bed sheets and kitchen towels, the counters and inside the fridge…DEEP CLEANING), my spirit just kept bringing up this word and phrase: “intentions”, “set your intentions.”

Now, of course, we all have goals and plans, and of course, many of those goals and plans went straight out the window from March to even now. We’re entering the second half of 2020, and there are a lot of unknowns still. A lot of heartbreak. A lot of changes and movements happening. And underneath this all is an overarching theme of healing…we’re all still trying to heal from things, whether it’s COVID-19 related, racism related, or something else personal going on in your life.

I looked up the definition of “intention,” and Oxford Languages via Google not only gave the “aim” or “plan” definition, it also provided this one:

“the healing process of a wound”

How ironic is that? Or maybe it’s not ironic at all; the Holy Spirit set that word on my heart for a reason or two. And I aim to write down every intention I have for this last half of the year, and to pray on each one and work towards those things coming into fruition, and healing after so much negativity, pain, and hurt.

I refuse to settle in this place I’ve been in.

Last month as I was mentally preparing for June, I was thinking about what words were brought to mind when the color yellow is seen. Of course, we think of the obvious ones: bright, joyful, exciting, inspiring, bold, confident. And now, the word I have for yellow is intention. The beautiful thing about this is that this isn’t just another project or set of posts for my feed, but it’s something personal I’m setting my mind to doing; I’m actively choosing to engage in this healing process of the wounds I’ve been digging my fingers in for way too long.

As my sis Cydney would say, I was manifesting my own downfall. And today, it’s time for that to end in ALL AREAS of my life.

Today, I cleaned my room. I prayed for God to clean my spirit. I cleaned my mind. I am abounding in my intentions.

What are some intentions that you have set for the last half of 2020? How are you healing with everything going on in our world? What steps can you take in your healing process?

Mishy 🦋💛

quarter of the way – bsgp.

So, many of you who follow me know that I’ve been working on The Brown Skin Girl Project since May began, leaving me really no time to blog until today, honestly. I had my very last interview for the project today, so all that’s left is to edit the videos, create the rest of the content and post!

I decided today to write a little bit about how the process has been up until now, and then check in again once the halfway mark, 3/4 mark, and the end is here…

first quarter.

Ahh the beginning…it seems so long ago!

Honestly, I was hella nervous during these first several interviews, mostly because I hadn’t done this in such a long time. I had already planned on switching shirts for every interview, even if they were scheduled on the same day, but with the way I was sweating through each one, it was necessary to change 😅

The last time I tried doing an interview project was four years ago when I still lived on Tybee, and I had created a Tybee Island Profiles page to go around and interview different locals from the island about who they were and what they did. That is honestly how my writing project #JustStartWriting began (another story for another time. Another project for another time too).

And it’s crazy because I didn’t really make the connection between this project and the Tybee Island project from years ago until recently. In some way, I guess those journalism classes I took in high school/college still stick with me!

I got excited when it came time to edit the videos because I hadn’t edited long videos in a while since my last #MotivationalMishyMonday season (also another project I need to work on. Be patient with me lol). And when I started the actual editing process…

Y’all, I won’t lie…I was slightly shocked at the amount of work that this project required. I knew I was going to have to put effort in, but I mean, I started staying up until 2am editing videos and making sure the content to post was accurate. I felt like I was back in college: slightly procrastinating, but getting the job done.

The releasing of a project is always exciting; the first post received so much feedback and support, I was honestly thrilled! Since then, things seemed to have slightly died down. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate anyone who’s been actively liking, sharing, commenting on everything that’s been posted so far! This isn’t about me and my platform, I just hope each of these ladies is getting not only exposure, but also support in what they’re doing and working towards!

I’m grateful for a couple of things:

  1. I’m grateful that, before all this quarantine-ing started, I went to SimplyMac at Hamilton Place Mall, and dropped the money I’d been saving on a MacBook Air. Because if I didn’t have this laptop, I probably wouldn’t have the opportunity to do this project. My old laptop was so outdated and slow, there would be no chance really of getting this project done as smoothly as it’s been going (even if I do stay up until 2am!)
  2. I’m really grateful for technology to be this advanced to do things such as this project. Zoom has been the best tool for this! I’ve been able to get to know these women better than just following them on Instagram, and seeing little snippets of their lives. I actually got to hear from their own mouths what drives them, what they long to do now and into the future, and random facts about them as well!
  3. I’m grateful for a project to work on at all during this time. Even though I will be returning to work soon, it’s nice to be able to do something this big and creative before I need to be back in a consistent schedule. It’s nice to feel what it will be like when I leave the 9-5 behind and create for a living!

As I write this, I’m almost halfway done with with the Brown Skin Girl Project, but I’ll save my halfway point thoughts for the next post I make about this!

What’s an idea you’ve been working on that’s turned into a project, a podcast, a website, etc.? How did it feel to work on something creatively and consistently? What are some things you’re thankful for that have allowed you to do your project?

Mishy 🦋🤎

P.S. Please make sure you head to my Instagram (@mishywrites) and check out the Brown Skin Girl Project! All interviews are on my IGTV channel, and pictures and favorite quotes of the women featured are on my actual page!

tired but grateful.

You may have already heard their names…Sean Reed and Ahmaud Arbery. More names to add to the murdered black males list. And while anything I write may not be different than anything else you’ve read or seen today, I feel the need to write about it on my blog because honestly, I’m so tired of being angry at things like this, sad at things like this, tired of all of this.

I’m tired of incidents like this having to be spammed all over social media before the news or the authorities talk about it, and before murderers are arrested. I’m tired of having more names become hashtags to get people’s attention. I’m tired of parents, siblings, significant others, children, and friends having to put the face and name of someone they love on a t-shirt, in a casket, and on a gravestone.

I’m tired of having fearful thoughts in my head sometimes when my boyfriend walks or drives to the corner store or gas station near my apartment, because I never know what could happen between here and there. I’m tired of being fearful for any of my fellow black friends, male or female, when they’re leaving from a party or event by themselves (and that’s even after walking with them to their car, and telling them to text me when they’ve made it home safe).

And I know I’m not the only one who’s tired of these things.

It’s during times like these that I’m grateful that my hope is not in this world, or in the people who are in this world. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t speak up, or try to hold people accountable for their actions, but I trust that God will deal with it accordingly, either now or when Christ returns. And the latter may not satisfy some who want to see justice now, but the unfortunate reality is that sometimes we may not see it all the way through in our lifetime.

I would love to see the slaughter of black people actually taken seriously before my lifetime is over. Shoot, I’d love for the slaughter of black people to NOT HAPPEN before my lifetime is over! I pray this to be so, and trust that God’s timing is better than mine. And I continue to put my hope in Him, and not the systems or those running them, since clearly, they have failed time and time again.

I pray that we all keep fighting for justice though; that our righteous anger wouldn’t burn out, that we would never hesitate to speak up or act in whatever way we can when murder occurs. That we keep fighting for actual equality to happen every single day. And that we love on the ones we have in our lives right now, near or far.

Mishy 🦋🤎

reality.

Well, y’all, it’s official. A set date has been made for when I’ll be returning to work, and it all seems so surreal. Part of me wonders how I’ll be once I do return; will I go back to the same habit of being constantly busy? I really hope not; seeing the hours I’m going to work though, I’m nervous that it’ll just be going back to same old, same old for me.

But I still have about three weeks left of social distancing, so I’m going to take advantage of it as much as possible!

Even though going back to work seems like going “back to reality,” I know for a fact it won’t be the same. Already, we’re having to change so many ways in which we need to do things; I’m afraid the place that I worked at before will never return to be the way it was even months after we return.

Don’t get me wrong, it will be sweet to reunite with my coworkers, and to see what new children I’ll get to have this summer. But a part of me does wish I could have had just one more week with the kids I had for this past school year. Even if I was rippin’ and runnin’ this semester (well, most of the school year), I still enjoyed my kids. I enjoyed teaching with my co-teachers, and getting to talk with them, not only about school things, but also about our lives.

And I could say that the routine was bearable, but maybe now I can have a better handle on how I do things from here on out when it comes to the time I do have outside of work.

Another part of me feels sort of selfish because I know that while I’ve had practically ten weeks off, there have been so many people who have continued to work, either on the front lines as essential workers, or from home. For some, it has picked up their workload even more so, and I do want to say how grateful I am for those who have been continuing to work through this whole pandemic time.

I can only continue to pray that even before I go back to work, things will get better. Life will return to when we can all be in large groups together without face masks, and without the concern that we may be endangering each other. And I can also pray that, when it is time for me to return to work, that I won’t return to the same habits that I had, but will be more present, more aware of how I’m feeling, more willing to sacrifice a routine or schedule to do things I feel led to do instead of doing things I “have” to do outside of work, and more grateful for the way things are, because things change quicker than we can blink our eyes.

What are some things you’ve learned that you can take with you once a routine away from social distancing starts for you? How can you be sure that you’ll stick to those things moving forward?

Mishy 🦋🤎

if you know an encourager/motivator/supporter…keep reading.

As someone who is known as an encourager and motivational speaker (I was also told yesterday that I’m viewed as a “life coach,” and I am humbled to have that title attached to me and what I do), I have something to say:

Please check up on people like me.

Sometimes there can be this misconception that people who are great at encouraging, motivating, and supporting others don’t need anyone to help them stay encouraged, motivated, or supported. This is a lie; truly, I could not do what I do, or say what I say, first of all without the help of the Holy Spirit, but it also helps to have wise, caring, and supportive people in my life to help me get through as well.

what I’m not saying…

  • I’m not saying that motivators/encouragers/supporters are always down in the dumps. But personally, I do go through my moments when I feel like I can’t do what I do; I can’t write, I can’t organize the projects I’m working on well, I can’t create well, etc. Everyone goes through those moments at some point in their journey, so just be mindful that those inspirational people go through them too.
  • I’m not saying that you need to check up on these people every single day. But if you think about them, shoot them a text. Call their phone, and if they don’t pick up, don’t take it personally, but leave a nice voicemail for them to listen to later. If you see something that reminds you of them, get it for them (depending on what it is), or take a picture of it and send it to them telling them that you thought about them when you saw it. There are so many ways for you to show someone that you’re thinking of them, or just hear for them if they need you. Sometimes these things are all it takes to turn someone’s day around. Get creative! 😊
  • I’m not guilt-tripping you right now if you haven’t checked up on these kinds of people in your life, I’m simply here to remind you! We all need reminders every now and then, and even though I’m an encourager, I have friends who are also encouragers that I need to be mindful about checking on too!

You know who the encouragers in your group of friends are, so I challenge you to reach out to one or two or all of them this week. Because it takes a lot for anyone to pour into people, or to pour out onto a platform or brand, and even though it may seem like they’re always up for it, I can guarantee you that there are days when they don’t feel up to it, and they most likely still do it anyway!

And for the record, I’m not writing this post because I’m currently feeling some type of way right now. I’m actually doing quite well, and I’m grateful for the people in my life who do check up on me when they think of me, or when they get the chance!

Mishy 🦋🤎

put to practice.

And just like that, y’all…I write a blog post about how things change, and today, things went and changed up on me! 😂 God must’ve been like, Okay, so you writing all this stuff…let’s see how well you put it into practice when it happens!

Some of the meetings I’d set up for the Brown Skin Girls project had to be switched around, leaving me another free day to do what I needed to do! In my mind, that just tells me that God thought I needed an extra day to prepare myself, and I’m grateful for that. Because I was excited, but also low-key nervous to start this project up, and having another day allowed me to truly be ready!

How do you handle change? Sometimes it’s easier to brush it off when it doesn’t inconvenience us, but when it throws a whole wrench in matters you’d already planned, it can be many things: annoying or frustrating. It can cause us to place a whole raincloud over a day that can still be just as good even if things didn’t go as planned.

I could go into how we’re all doing this thing that none of us ever planned, but I’m sure you all understand by now. I’m sure many of us have gone through different phases during this time, and are still going through those phases as it drags on longer and longer. I pray that you see each day not as an inconvenience, but as opportunity. That we allow ourselves to see the silver lining when a cloud comes through.

Did anyone write down their end-of-the-month check-up based off my blog post yesterday? If you missed out, you can find it here. It’ll help you think about all the changes that have occurred, the ways in which you’ve changed, and what should leave or stay in regards to May being tomorrow!

Not too much to write about today, BUT I’ve decided to tell the story about my succulent plant here on the blog tomorrow, so stay tuned!

Mishy 🦋🤍

healing wholly.

Happy Tuesday, luvvies!

It’s been days since I’ve blogged, but it’s because of the new Brown Skin Girl Project I’ve been organizing! I’ve been scheduling meetings, emailing reminders, creating content, all the while just trying to get in some time to do all the things I’ve been doing since the quarantine started.

Last week was a good week for me, honestly. It was the first time in a while that I’d felt more at peace, more grounded and centered, and actually okay with who and where I am, and what I look like. Maybe the latter is because my skin is clearing up due to my new skin care routine, and actually drinking enough water 😅 And maybe the other two are because of my willingness to surrender everything I’d been feeling, and to allow God to work through all of it in His own way.

It doesn’t mean it’s easy, though. I wish I could say that I recently felt the same way as I did last week, but the Enemy does his best to kill the joy that you feel somehow, especially after you feel like you’re “in the clear.”

But one thing I can say, is that I’m thankful for this time I’ve been given; these couple of months being stowed away at home have given me time to heal wholly.

half the healing

Before when I was working about 10 hours a day then going straight from work to the gym then back home just to have enough time to shower, eat, and then go to sleep, I had hard days when I thought self-sabotaging thoughts and placed the weight of everything associated with me upon myself. And what did I do? I’d just shove those feelings down my throat as best as I could, and kept it pushing. Because there wasn’t time to act like that; I had things to do, people to work with, a schedule to uphold. If I cried, I’d have maybe 10 minutes in the bathroom at work to do it before my coworkers wondered where I was (doesn’t mean I never did it. I just felt guilty for doing so). Or I’d have 10 minutes before my boyfriend had to clock into work to briefly talk about it before I couldn’t speak to him for another 2 hours.

Those little 10-minute moments were simply mini-healing sessions, times I tried to sort through what was going through my mind in as little time as possible before I just pushed it all to the back burner and got back to my routine. Sometimes they worked, and sometimes they didn’t. In hindsight, I I feel like it was mostly unhealthy for me to rush the healing process, but during that time, I really thought they were somehow still helping me by getting it all out little by little.

The problem was that there wasn’t really healing happening, just bandaging it up. Maybe not even that; more like putting duct tape over an open wound, and planning on taking it off later, only to rip the tape off, opening the wound even more, and seeing that there was no healing ever happening…the wound may even look worse because I didn’t tend to it properly in the moment it should have been dealt with.

Unfortunately, I’ve been dealing with all of those duct-taped wounds during this quarantine time, and while what I may post seem all peachy keen to you all, what I’d been feeling on the inside has been truly hurtful. Not all the time, mind you, but I definitely have had some hard times mentally. Having all of those wounds patched while I tried to truly heal only allowed their toxicity to come through, and try to tear down those parts of me I was working on.

still surrendering

Honestly, I started writing this post yesterday morning, and I went through different phases. Yesterday morning, I was talking bout how I could see the progress I was making in surrendering, not just creative projects, but in my life. Then yesterday evening, I was having a hard time letting go of some of the things I thought I let go. And today, I’m feeling so much better!

I even had to go back and reread the last blog I posted about surrender to remind myself what I even said. How often do we do that though? Feel like we’ve taken three steps forward, and then in a day or so, we feel like we’re right back to where we started.

But I’m learning to be more gentle with myself, to be okay with the surrender being a process, as everything is. It’s a daily battle: to surrender the burdens I feel like I need to hold onto, and the weight of things in my life that I feel I must carry, or it won’t make it to where God eventually wants me to be.

what about you?

Have you been healing during this time? What are some ways you’ve been doing that? How have you been handling the rough days? The good days? How do you remind yourself that God is in control of all things, and that you need to daily surrender to Him?

Mishy 🦋🤍

surrender.

I just had to surrender.

Sometimes, when I want to create something new, be it a poem or full on project, I get frustrated when it doesn’t come to me quickly. I try to think of new ways to do things, try to look things up, brainstorm, and nothing will come.

But there’s something about that moment of surrender…

When you just roll with the punches, when you just go on about your day, doing the things you had in mind to do, or letting the day unfold before you; I find that it’s in THOSE times…an idea is formed. I truly believe my best ideas are God sent, and I believe He won’t send them until I surrender the process to Him. Because if I try hard to think of something, and end up with a plan, more than likely, I’ll pat myself on the back for it than give God the credit.

So I’m grateful for the times He reminds me to just let Him work. To just keep my hands open to receive what He has for me.

I did a lot of letting go this morning as I started my day, and I feel like it made my day go 10x’s smoother than when I’ve just got a closed fist over everything. Keeping my hand shut tight gives me the illusion of control, when in reality, it only hinders me from opening my eyes and heart to the things around me, to other things I haven’t thought of.

I encourage you: surrender. Wherever you are and whatever you’ve got going on, open up that hand of yours. Release any sense of control you think you have or should have, and ask God to open your eyes.

I believe that what He reveals to you will be more beautiful, more extravagant than you can imagine!

How hard is it for you to surrender? What are some things you might need to let go of to make room for God to show you something new?

Mishy 🦋🤍