the power of the creative.

My heart went out to her, and immediately, I just felt my purpose rise within me. Not in a prideful sense that said, “You WILL be the answer to her problems!” But more of, “I just want to shed hope to her situation; shine a light on any places in her life where it may be dim.”

A friend of mine was super vulnerable on her Instagram story several days ago, and hearing her vulnerability made me think several things…

  1. I’m SO PROUD of her for being that brave. Because we’re all in a pretty vulnerable, uncertain time right now, and for her to just express how she’s been feeling recently, and hopefully shed light on someone else’s situation was so admirable to me
  2. My heart went out to her, and I longed to understand her, to connect with her. I wasn’t super familiar with the situation she was in, but I thought, I wonder what writer she could read that would make her feel heard? I wonder what music she could listen to that would make her feel understood? Which motivational speaker could she watch of a video of, and feel like she isn’t alone?

this is our time.

I’ve seen a post several times on social media that talks about how, in the times we’re in right now with the quarantine/social distancing, people are looking to artists. To creatives. Because we’re capable of expressing hope and joy and peace when there seems to be none in sight. We’re able to relieve stress by creating things to ease people’s minds. And listening to my friend, my creative spirit just welled up inside of me, and honestly, that encouraged and inspired me.

Honestly, despite having time to work on things and write, I was initially feeling sort of unmotivated and uninspired at the beginning of this break. But hearing my friend tell her testimony to help others, it immediately inspired me to want to help others in my own way too, whether that be through poetry, my own testimony, or whatever!

So, any creatives out there…how have you stayed motivated in this time of quarantine? Who or what has inspired you to inspire someone else? It doesn’t even have to be a piece of art or a song, but it could just be someone writing or saying their experiences so far in this pandemic we’re all living in.

I hope you’re not just dwelling on your own situation, but you’re making an effort to hear others out as well. That’s how we’re all able to relate to one another. That is how we’re able to connect, uplift, and inspire! And you don’t even have to have the official “creative” label over your head to do this. And that’s the most beautiful thing 😍

This is our time, creatives! Let’s do this!

Mishy 🦋🙌🏽

end-of-the-month check-up.

TODAY.

Tell me HOW the last day of January is here already?! Normally, I’m with everyone who says that January is so long that it feels like the complete first half of the year is happening instead of the first month, but I truly feel like it has flown by.

Maybe it’s because I have SO much I want to do this year, and I want the time to slow down so I can get it all done, but of course, time waits for no one.

I want to do this thing where I (and you, whoever you are, reading) give ourselves a little check-up to see how we’re doing, where we are, and what may need to change/stay the same as a new month approaches. I feel like this is something my friends over at Dream On Youth have done/written about! (You should go check them out with their new website up!!)

So, let’s begin, shall we?

Accomplishments 🎉

  • What did you achieve this month?
  • Did you start something new?
  • Did you finish any resolutions you made at the beginning of the year?

Lessons 🤔

  • What did you learn this month?
  • How can you take any failures/mistakes you made this month, and turn them into lessons learned?
  • How can you apply these lessons to this next month coming up?

Goals 📝

  • What new goals do you have for next month?
  • Which goals from last month will be transferred to this month? How long do you think it will take to achieve them?
  • Write down specific things you need to work on. Remember that your goal isn’t to get these things perfect by next month, it’s to progress in them next month!

Spiritual Life 🙏🏽

  • What was one major thing God revealed to you this month?
  • What was a prayer God answered this month? (Not answered with a “yes” specifically, just answered: yes, no, wait, etc.)
  • In what ways do you feel like you’ve grown spiritually?
  • What areas in your spiritual life do you need to work on?

Relationships 🤝

  • Name at least 3-5 people you got to meet/got to know this month.
  • Name at least 3-5 people you would want to meet up with/get to know better next month.
  • If you weren’t really social this month, write down ways you can make more time to spend time with those you love

Self-Care ✨

  • Did you get to make time for yourself this month?
  • If “YES,” in what ways? Which ones will you hold onto this next month? Will/how can you switch things up next month?
  • If “NO,” how can you be sure to make time for yourself/take care of yourself this month? What things will you focus on in your self-care routine?

***Remember! Self-care doesn’t have to be expensive…you don’t need to spend money! There are plenty of ways to take care of yourself that cost nothing 😊

This is what I can think of right now, as it’s almost 7am and I’ve been up since around 5am 😅 Use this as a guide, and be sure to add on your own lists and bullets of things that you want to check yourself with!

Let’s make this last day of January count! And let’s prepare for February’s arrival 💕

Mishy 🦋

imbalance.

Ahh yes, I knew it would come…the day I would forget/just not blog. But I’m back! You can’t get rid of me so easily this time around!

Honestly, I tried to think of a topic yesterday, but I couldn’t. And then I remembered that this isn’t about finding topics to write about, but just about writing just to write. Some days there’ll be a serious topic, other days, it’s me just writing. 🤷🏽‍♀️ You’ll never know what you get til you click the link!

Plus, you guys get to read my thoughts on things, and even keep up with how I’m doing. Because I truly don’t see many people like that anymore due to trying to balance out being busy, still maintaining somewhat of a social life, and resting when I need to. And yesterday was a perfect example.

As I reflect on a day like yesterday, I truly don’t know how I did what I used to do back when I became an official adult. I’d work, I’d attempt to workout (somewhat), I’d cook, I’d schedule hang out times with friends and rarely have time to myself because I didn’t like to be alone or be in the house for a huge amount of time. I loved being out and about and on-the-go 95% of the time, that is, until my body finally had had enough, and shut down on me one Saturday afternoon in the middle of me hanging out with a friend, and she had to bring me home, and I just slept for hours after that.

Today though, you can catch me in the same 3 places most days out of the week – work, the gym, and my apartment. It’s pretty rare that I go out anymore on weeknights mostly because I work sort of late, and then once I’m out of the gym it’s already 8pm, and I get up at 5am every weekday so you tell me how much time I have left to do what I need to do, and get a somewhat good amount of sleep before I have to do it all over again the next day. 👀

The only time I’m out during the week is:

  1. Tuesdays because that’s sister date night with my sister
  2. If I’ve scheduled in advance a hangout/dinner with a friend
  3. An event to network/enjoy myself/support a friend
  4. Practicing for an event

I say ALL of that to basically say: balancing is hard. Having to say “yes” and “no” to certain things is hard. And I find that once I figure out a good balance in my schedule and routine, something else gets thrown in the mix for me to stay on my toes and keep balancing.

It can be hard (for me, personally) not to complain when things don’t go as planned or “on schedule,” or they don’t stay in routine. It’s good to keep the balancing muscle working; otherwise, life would be the same ole, same ole, and we’d be bored out of our minds, and longing for new, exciting things.

So when a day (more like afternoon) like yesterday happens and I’m jumping from one thing to the next (work, working out, shower, basketball game, drop sissy off) without any sort of breathing room, and then finally landing in my apartment later than I’d expected, and then getting to bed later than I wanted to, and then I realize I never posted a blog because I spent that time talking to coworkers at work, and just bonding with them…

…I really have to sit back, and just be grateful for the time I had, and embrace the “imbalance” of my routine. Sure, I may be a little more tired today (pass the coffee please 🥴☕️) and I didn’t blog yesterday, but I did so much and had so much fun doing it. I got to see and talk to people I love and care about. I was still able to get a workout in when I normally skip on Tuesdays. I got to see a good friend play basketball, and his team win another game 🙌🏽

There can be beauty in the imbalance of things, in the rushing from place to place, and unplanned conversations. You can go to bed knowing you lived a full day of your life, grateful and blessed by all you did and experienced!

What are your initial reactions to your schedule/routine not going as planned? Do you feel rushed, agitated, frustrated? What beautiful things can you see and feel in the imbalanced moments of your life?

Mishy 🦋

making adjustments.

I realized the day was almost over with, and I hadn’t written a post yet!

Truthfully, I wasn’t sure what to write about…today’s been a good day, but somewhat odd. My personal world is changing a little so things that were once routine are now gone, and a new routine is taking place. While I’m learning to be okay with the adjustment, I’m also feeling like I have to learn how to make the adjustment too. It’s a process.

As I’m going through this, I’m thinking back on times when I made adjustments, and how I was able to manage them…did I struggle, or was the transition smooth? Did I even realize I was going through an adjustment phase, or was I focused on other things that I didn’t really notice?

We’re all in a constant state of transition…life changes before our very eyes, and sometimes we see can see it happen (specific, memorable changes or events), and sometimes it’s so gradual, we can’t pinpoint where the change began. Either way, we form new routines once we get our footing within the transition, and we continue on living.

My prayer as I am entering this new phase is that I would be led in wisdom and strength; that I wouldn’t waste my time wishing things were back to how they used to be, or longing for this phase to be over. I grasp this time with gratefulness, trusting that God is going to use it as He sees fit to shape me.

We’re all in phases right now, some of us still in the same one we’ve been in for a long time, others of us currently adjusting to a new season, and still others of us have been in a new phase but are still learning to adjust. I pray that if you’ve been in a negative phase for a while, that God would continue to comfort you and bring you peace as you seek Him, and as He takes you into a new season, whatever it may hold.

If you’ve been in a pretty good phase, I pray that God continues to bless you, and will strengthen you whenever hard seasons come. It’s easy to forget that hard things happen in good seasons, so I pray for awareness and vigilance, and most importantly, steadfastness – that you would not give up, and would not let go of God’s Hand.

If you’re unsure how to handle a transition or what adjustments to make, I encourage you to pray for wisdom from God. Ask Him how He would have you use the time that He’s given you! Seek clarity despite feeling overwhelmed and out of sorts; He hears you, and desires to help bring you out of chaos into order!

As always, if I’m encouraging you readers in things, that most likely means I’m also encouraging myself! 🙌🏽 Don’t think I’ve got it together just because I’m blogging about these things cause whew 😬 God knows I surely need the help and encouragement too!

What will you focus on in the phase of life that you’re in? How well do you adjust to new phases and seasons? What do you/will you pray for as you continue on in the routine that you’re in?

Mishy 🦋

are blog posts DEAD?!

Super excited to expound upon this because I thought about this topic as soon as I pressed PUBLISH on my money on my mind blog post

But seriously…is the blog dead, now?? Do people still read blogs, or do they expect to read just little paragraphs or blurbs like they do on Instagram and Twitter, and move on?

Well, I for one, surely hope the blog isn’t dead. I mean, clearly, the platform hasn’t died, but has it died in the hearts of people today? Are we too caught up in images, that we lack the capacity to read text anymore?

I did a little poll on Instagram a couple of weeks ago, and thankfully, most of the people who voted said they still read blogs. And that’s awesome…obviously because I use the blog as a platform, but also because so many people still use them as well!

My soul sister Cydney described it like so:

“Blogs are valuable because you own that space. Social media can be deleted at any point and you could lose all that content if it’s not on a website.”

And I never thought about it like that. Sure, we all have our own accounts on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, etc., but if any of those companies decided to shut down, we’d lose all of those photos, quotes, etc. that we created and shared.

Not to say that blog sites can’t close their doors as well, but it’s less likely. Because there are websites for ANY and EVERY THING out there. What pulls up when you Google something? WEBSITES. More and more websites. Yeah, you’ll get IG and Twitter accounts here and there depending on what you’re searching, but mostly, you’re getting websites.

Thinking about this and talking about it with Cydney encouraged me and took a little weight off my shoulders. Because I tend to put so much weight on my blog sometimes; it grew so much when I was consistently writing and focusing on it, and now that I’ve started focusing on other things, I feel bad that I’ve somewhat abandoned it. In some way, I feel like I’ve contributed to those who believe that blogs are dead.

But it’s also good to remind myself that the life of blogs doesn’t lie on my shoulders alone, but on every blogger and writer out there! And there are plenty of them with different topics, themes, and subjects!

Do you still read blogs? What kinds of blogs do you like to read? Name some blogs in the comments (along with the type of blog they are – travel, fashion, music, lifestyle, cooking, etc.) that you think I should check out!

As a blogger myself, I want to do better this year about reading blogs as much as I write them! So please, give me suggestions in the comments!!

🎉 HAPPY FRIDAY! 🎉

Mishy 🦋

my space…#JSW Season 2

I’ve made up my mind: I’m going to blog every day (except Sundays) like I used to back in 2016 when I began my #JustStartWriting challenge. Not “trying to” or “wanting to,” but GOING TO. DOING.

I would have started yesterday, but as I wrote my blog post, I was having trouble getting out what I wanted to say because I was way too worried about what it sounded like. Basically, I didn’t want to offend anyone, I didn’t want to get anything “politically incorrect,” and I didn’t want to sound a certain type of way for people who don’t know me personally to judge me off of that one blog post.

And if I’m being honest, that’s why I stopped blogging for a while; I wanted to write about certain topics, but as I started writing, I felt the need to continuously write side notes, by the ways, if’s/and’s/but’s… Basically, I was tired of trying to explain what I was trying to say without stepping on anybody’s toes, and, if any other bloggers/writing who are reading this know exactly what I mean, that gets exhausting. I mean, even in normal conversation, I’m sure everyone gets tired of having to explain exactly what they mean all the time.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind clearing up a few things/thoughts if I can briefly express them in a short sentence or two. But sometimes having to take a whole paragraph or two to explain that I don’t mean something in a certain way just discourages me from finishing blog posts. So I feel like there are SO many blog posts in my drafts that have good ideas, but are unfinished due to this.

Well, starting today, I say, NO MORE!

Because I’ve cared way too much about other’s opinions of what I’m writing when, in fact, this is MY space to write MY thoughts down! And if someone disagrees or has a thought, then the comments is a space where they can place their thoughts, and what I do with that information is completely up to me.

And after reading my very first #JustStartWriting challenge post when I decided to do this for only a month (which turned into like 3-4 months!), the whole point was for me to just blog…to just write. Whatever came to my mind, or whatever inspired me that day. And I’m excited to get back to that.

So, with that being said: hello, blog! I’ve missed you immensely. I’ve felt the need to return to you as I’m continuing on with this journey of mine: being a creative navigating adulthood, expressing my feelings and encouraging others through different media.

To my readers who are bloggers: have you ever felt the need to over-explain yourself in you blog? How did you overcome it? How did it affect your writing before/after you overcame it?

To my readers who are, well, readers: what kind of blog content interests you? What allows you to continue reading and what causes you to stop mid-paragraph and close out the tab?

Mishy 🦋

Changes…in Blogging/Writing?

So, clearly it has been a minute since I’ve blogged. The past several days have been crazy, and last night it culminated into me being extremely tired and just needing sleep.

And during those past several days, I’ve been wondering if I should change the way I blog to you all. I’ve been seeing the way some of my favorite bloggers blog – writing a post or two here and there, maybe once or twice a week, and their content is so relevant and real and truthful, and I’m sitting here wondering if the way I’m blogging is just too much for me, and isn’t the best way to blog.

A little over a year ago, I challenged myself to blog every day, forcing myself to write every day so that I could get better at writing. And granted, I’ve missed a good amount of days throughout, but overall, I’ve blogged so much more overall in the past year than I have in the past maybe four or five years since I’ve started blogging.

But I’m wondering if me just trying to rush a post out to you every day is really doing anything. Is it really giving you the best of me as a writer? Am I just getting sloppy in the writing I’ve done / am doing? Am I only giving half of myself over to you as I try to work on other writing projects I have, and if so, is that fair to you? Is it fair to me?

I’ve been wrestling with these thoughts, and here are some conclusions I’ve come up with…

It’s My Fault

The way I feel about blogging every day right now – like it’s rushed, like the content I’m putting out isn’t enough, like I’m boring you guys with insignificant details in my life – it’s all my fault really. Truly, if I could just prioritize the things in my life correctly, maybe blogging things won’t be so hard or painful for me sometimes. Not that there won’t be days in which I sit at my computer and think, “Dude…I have nothing to write about, what am I going to write about??” But I feel like less of that would come with better planning on my part.

Yet what do I do? I don’t plan. I work and write I feel on a whim, and I sometimes feel like it’s all rushed. Maybe I work well under pressure. Who am I kidding, I say that, but while I’m working like that, I’m stressed as all get out!

So, as always, some priorities need to be shifted. I write this, yet will I actually shift anything? Hopefully. Someone keep me accountable, please, I beg.

A Break

Blogging to you guys only two or three times a week would be an amazing break for me, honestly. It would give me more time during the day to do other things I need to do. It would give you guys an expectation of when the blogs will be coming out and when they wouldn’t (because right now, y’all may be expecting a blog post every day, and clearly that isn’t happening).

Better Content

Only blogging a few times a week would give me the chance to write better content for you guys, I think. Especially when it comes to deeper subjects – I can’t even tell you how many things I want to write to you all about, yet I feel like I can’t just crank it out in an hour or however long I have in my day to blog. Maybe I just need to do it to challenge myself. I just feel like I want to make sure what I’m writing to you all is understandable, and reflects my thoughts and opinions as best as it can.

And when I’m trying to write a blog every day, I feel like it isn’t my best sometimes; I feel like I’m just throwing some words out there for you all so I can say, “Yes, I blogged today! Another day in a row that I’ve done this!” I don’t want this to become a checklist thing, or a thing that I dread doing; I want to do it so that my writing and communication is growing and being challenged.

#JustStartWriting

Truly, the whole blogging every day thing was based on #JustStartWriting, which is now it’s own thing – it has its own website, and still has the same meaning and motto, it’s just now out there for more writers to be a part of. It’s no longer a solo thing of mine that I do.

However, this is where my thoughts on actually just posting whenever I have “good content” stop. Because when I look back on the year I’ve had with my writing, #JustStartWriting really shaped my writing – it got me actually writing instead of just wishing I was writing. It challenged me to really think about my day, and pay attention to what was happening in my life so that later, I could write about it. Just because #JSW is now it’s own separate thing, it doesn’t give me permission to drop the way I personally write.

Why am I going to have a separate site based in just starting to write to get past the fear, the laziness, the whatever else to write if I’m not willing to do that myself? Granted, I could “just start write” in my journal, or you know, on this book I’ve been wanting to write.

But I think blogging is just in my blood; like I feel so weird skipping out on writing here (except Sundays, that’s a given). I honestly think it’s because of gotten busy and lazy. Busier with trying to keep up with the new sites I’ve got, and also trying to work on and release spoken word poems I’ve been writing. More lazy in the fact that there are times in which I could blog, and I just don’t feel the draw, or I don’t feel like I have something good enough to write about. Also lazy in the fact that I haven’t been paying that much attention to my surroundings as much as I used to. I feel like my days run like clockwork, and I don’t take the time to really take in what’s happening. Therefore, my writing is lacking.

 

All this to say – I’m still going to try my best to blog every day. I won’t succeed all the time, obviously, but I still want this to be a priority of mine. I want it to still be an important part of my writing journey. And if I’m encouraging other writers out there to just start writing – to not let the fear of their writing not being good enough, the laziness of only dreaming of writing and being great at it, or the other worries or excuses that conjure up in their mind keep them from writing – then I need to keep on writing as best as I can.

So, no changes in the vision. Changes in the execution of the vision, however, are in the process of being made. Stay tuned – I’m going to try to do this better than I have been.

#MishyWrites 🦋✨

Consistency is Key (#JSW)

I am unwilling to admit defeat, and not post SOMETHING on my blog after I've posted for three days straight. That's the most consistent I've been able to be these days, and it KILLS ME because this time last year I was blogging every day.
So, to stay consistent, I'm going to share what I wrote for the #JustStartWriting website update here on my blog. It's actually about writing consistency, ironic, right?
Anyways, I hope you enjoy it. And I hope the last Postcard Prose will be up tomorrow for you all!
Thank you for being patient with me! 😊


So, you've decided to "just start writing," and that is awesome! I congratulate you on making the first step!

Now, what if you really want this to work? Like, this isn't just an experiment for you; you truly long to get better at the writing you're pursuing, and to grow within it. Or you've done the experiment, and you've decided that, yes, this is where you belong. That's so great, and I'm so excited for you!

"Just start writing" is a great mantra to help motivate you to begin your writing process, but there are some things you as the writer have to understand when it comes to "just start writing"…

Just starting to write isn't the only thing that matters. I know, it's the basis of this entire website. But there are other pieces to good writing that you have to keep in mind, such as your consistency, your audience, and your content.

Let's talk about consistency…

Start to Finish

Just starting to write something is a major accomplishment, and you should be proud of yourself for taking that step! But you can't just end with starting; you have to keep going.

What I mean is, just starting to write is a commitment; it's something you have to constantly keep up with if you truly want to make this writing thing something serious in your life. Now, I understand that some of you writers write for fun, not necessarily to have a career in it, or to be known in it, and that's totally fine. But even if you write for fun, you don't just write once a month, and expect your writing to actually go somewhere. You write consistently – every day, every other day, every week, etc.

You can't start something and expect to get to the finish line without consistently keeping up with what you started.

Pace Yourself

Maybe I hit you a little too hard with the consistency hammer, and what you read was, "YOU HAVE TO WRITE EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. IN ORDER FOR YOU TO BE A GOOD WRITER BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I DID, AND NOW I HAVE THIS WEBSITE, AND NOW I KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT WHEN IT COMES TO WRITING, AND YOU DON'T…"

Breathe, dear reader, I'm not yelling at you. And I definitely don't know what I write to you half the time, if I'm honest.

All I'm saying is, write consistently. I personally challenged myself to write every day. Maybe your speed is more writing every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday; or every weekend. It doesn't matter what it is, I just think that it is important for you to have some sort of consistent writing schedule to keep you accountable, whether you're writing for yourself or for other people (we'll talk about your audience next month!). Actually, writing for other people really keeps you accountable because those people will expect you to write when you said you would, and you'll actually do it!

But you can't expect to get better at writing, or for people to think your writing is good if you don't actually keep up with it. Go at your own pace, though, and don't be discouraged if another writer is going faster than you! It is better to write at your own pace, and learn and grow in and through your writing, than to rush through it and not understand what you're writing at all.

Your writing sessions also don't have to be extremely long. Sometimes dragging something out makes it less enjoyable, and you won't look forward to writing again. Keep your writing times fairly short, if you need to. Good writers don't have to write for hours at a time; start small, say, fifteen minutes. Then gradually add time as you start to get comfortable with your writing.

"I Missed A Day. I Suck."

I'm also not telling you that it's totally bad if you don't write on a day you were supposed to write. Have you seen how inconsistent my blog has been these days? When I started the #JustStartWriting challenge, I think I only missed a few days of writing because of traveling. These days, I'm missing three or more writing days out of the week. I'm trying to be better.

But don't beat yourself up if you miss a day or two. It's okay, just get back on your feet, and hit the ground running with your words. It's too easy sometimes to let a failure or two discourage you from continuing something. Don't give up! Just do better next time; figure out what stopped you from writing that day, and adjust your schedule, or write for more than one day if you know you won't have time to write during your next scheduled writing day.

Failing is how we learn. So take the failures as opportunities to strengthen your writing consistency.

"But I Don't Have Time."

This is the biggest excuse in the book, and I will admit, I've used it more than once, especially these days when I'm trying to organize this site, keep up with my blog, and also work on outside writing projects to release. I'm tempted to see everything I have before me and say, "I don't have time to write."

And, I get it; life is filled with all sorts of things, and sometimes, the last thing on your mind is writing something for yourself, or for others to read.

But I encourage you (and encourage myself) to find the time. Someone once told me that you find the time for the things (and people) you love. If you love writing, and you really want to have a go at it, you will find the time to do it. You won't be perfect every single time at finding the time, but you'll be willing to try.

It isn't "I don't have the time," it's "I have the time somewhere; where in my schedule could I squeeze a small writing session?"
I hope that this was an encouragement to you writers as you continue your personal writing journey! Stay consistent with your writing! Don't be discouraged if you aren't always consistent because we're only human; you will make mistakes, and that's okay! Learn from them, and keep going!

You've decided to just start writing, now just keep writing! You got this!

Love ya!
Mishy

💙🦋

Cabo Vacation Re-Cap

Hey guys!

Honestly, this isn’t the first post I wrote for today; I wrote something about post-vacay depression because it hit me really hard as soon as I got back to my apartment this afternoon. I tried to ease back into my normal by unpacking and doing laundry, trying to get things in order, and setting aside clothes for church tomorrow, and each activity made my heart ache even more than before.

But How Was Cabo Tho?

Cabo was AMAZING. I posted a lot of pictures on Instagram about what we were doing almost every day (sorry not sorry) – snorkeling, driving ATVs, riding a boat to the beach and a few famous Cabo sites, getting a massage, relaxing by the poolside – these images can’t even do the trip justice. It was a vacation each one of us needed, especially since we hadn’t been together for a long time.

A few people wondered if I would vlog the trip, and even though it would have made a really sweet vlog, there were a couple of reasons why I didn’t vlog…

  1. Cameras: Unfortunately, I’ve lost my cameras, and I think they’re lost for good. I’ve tried all that I can to relocate them, but I think they’re gone, guys. I sometimes still have waves of worry and hurt because of my perfectionism: “It’s my fault that I don’t have them anymore, and how could I have been so careless and forgetful about where I had them?” but I’m slowly getting over it. You may be thinking, “Mishy, you could have just filmed on your iPhone…it takes HD videos too.” But here’s where number two comes in…
  2. Presence: I would have been totally distracted during my vacation had I tried to vlog most of the time. Sure, I was still a little distracted taking pictures, and even with some things like the song with SodTp dropping, and promoting my website dropping next week. But, I would have worried more about what my vacation looked like than what it actually was. And I know that would have regretted doing that, even if the footage would have been amazing.

So, no vlogging on vacation. I just think I enjoyed myself more than if I had tried to. I hope to get back to it, though, once I can get some things in order. I’ve just got a lot going on right now, and it’s hard to juggle everything at once.

Post.Vacay.Depression

I walked into my apartment, weary of the short trek I’d taken from my car and up the stairs to my front door. I dreaded hearing the empty echoes of my footsteps across the living room floors, and the silence met with me shuffling along to get myself and my stuff through the door and to my room.

A curtain of relief fell upon my shoulders as I heard the quiet voice of one of my roommates, who was sitting in her bedroom. It didn’t completely take the emptiness I was feeling away, but it did cheer me up.

Since coming home this afternoon, I’ve been doing laundry, taking inventory of my pantry for grocery shopping tomorrow, and organizing/cleaning things in my room. I tried to listen to some music, but a lot of what I wanted to listen to reminded me of my trip and my friends, and it was too sentimental. I swear, I’ve been on the verge of tears all afternoon.

I’m so grateful for the time I had last week. I’m grateful for the concert I went to before I traveled, and all of the traveling safety that the Lord provided. And right now, I’m trying to be grateful to be home. But I’m really struggling. So much so that I’m scrambling to find new music to listen to, I’ve ordered pizza and ice cream for myself, started a new Netflix show to keep my away from reality, and talked to my best friend (whom I just saw yesterday, mind you) for almost an hour-and-a-half.

The post-vacay depression is so real.

I have such a hard time when exciting things end, as I’m sure everyone else does. Like when a concert is over, everyone is sad because they don’t want it to be over. I expressed my sadness to my roommate, and explained that I would rather have something else exciting happen, or my work week immediately start than admit that the exciting event or concert or vacation is over.

And after briefly talking with her about it, and sitting here eating pizza and watching The Carmichael Show on Netflix to try to suppress the sad feelings, I realize that I really need to process through what’s happened, no matter how much it hurts…

I went to a concert last Friday, and had a blast.

The next morning, I flew out to Mexico, and spent one whole week doing things I’d never done in a place I’d never been before. I laughed harder than I’d laughed in a while. While I was in Mexico, the week back home was normal – work was still happening. My friends were going about their daily lives. I missed one whole normal week here at home in exchange for the best summer vacation I’ve ever had.

And now it’s over. And yes, it’s sad that it’s over – my best friend is back in our hometown for another week. I’m preparing myself mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually for this new upcoming week (even though I am slightly pushing the feelings down with food and Netflix). Even writing out this blog is helping me accept what my reality is.

Next week is a big week; there are only a few days left until some major things happen. In order for things to run smoothly, I need to allow myself the time to ease back into my normal routine, even if I don’t like the feeling of it. Even if it makes my  heart ache, and miss the times and experiences I had.

Praising the Lord that this post-vacay depression is slowly starting to ease up. I think every hour back home makes it a little easier on me.

I’m done with vacation. Now I’m back on the grind.

💙 Mishy 🦋

“To Be Yourself” (“April 9” poem)

Good morning from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico!

I’ve been here for a couple of days already, but I haven’t been blogging because of all the busyness. But here I am! I hope your week has gotten off to a great start.

My week has started off rather lovely. For those who don’t know, I wrote a poem that has been featured in a song titled “April 9” created by SodTp (you can find it on Spotify and iTunes under the artist name “SodTp”). Only pieces of the poem have been used for the song, so here is the full-version of the poem!

I hope that “April 9” and “To Be Yourself” speak to you and inspire you in some way, shape, or form. Even though it’s difficult to want to be someone else or have what someone else has, or to hear those criticisms from the people in your life, you are you, and it’s time to embrace who you are and where you are in life.

And I’ve said this so many times, but THANK YOU to SodTp for the opportunity to share my words on this track, to the people who’ve been following SodTp and now follow me and have expressed such love and support

I give you, “To Be Yourself.”

To Be Yourself

There are days in which I wish that I could
Sit in the skin of another person.
There are times I wanna
Take pieces and parts of other people,
And place them on top of me to
Hide what’s within.
To hide my soul.
To hide who I really am.

And I know sometimes you get like that too.
You’d rather be somebody else than
Embrace everything that you are.
But you don’t need to look farther than yourself.

It’s time to stop frontin’;
To stop pretending to be somethin’ or
Or someone you’re not.
You’re the only you the world has to claim.
There may be someone out there who has the
Same name as you but
You were intricately woven and
Uniquely designed, yes,
There are things in this world you were specifically chosen for.
But you gotta stop lookin’ everywhere else to
Be who you wanna be.

To be yourself.

#MishyWrites #April9

💙 Mishy 🦋