Last weekend, one of my writing buddies Rachel invited me to this creative writing group that meets at a coffee shop in St. Elmo every first Monday of the month. And for the first time, I think ever, I was excited to meet with other writers and just sit and write and share and listen. I actually didn’t end up sharing what I wrote (maybe next month!), but it was great to be in that type of atmosphere again, even though I used to really hate it.
Any type of writing class I took in college gave me both excitement and dread – it was exciting to learn new things about writing, but I dreaded having to possibly read my work in front of other English majors and writers. But this time, even though I didn’t share, I felt less intimidated. Maybe it’s because I’ve been sharing my writing through my public blog, so really, anyone in the world can read it? Or maybe I’ve just grown up, who knows.
Anyways, in this creative writing group, we chose three words out of a mug, and for twenty-five minutes, we’d write something inspired by those words, or if we weren’t feeling it, just write whatever came to our minds.
My words were ring, glide, and fear. And for the second prompt, I had the words empower, effect, and armadillo.
And yes, I’m going to share with you some of what I wrote in my journal that night. And no, they aren’t really finished. I’m not really sure if I’ll ever finish them. But here they are…
I work with kids. So really, anything and everything needs to be taken into consideration – the size of the foods they eat, what you as a teacher/co-teacher/floater/substitute wear and if it is valuable enough tot keep at home, for anything you bring to work is in danger of coming into contact with a child’s bodily fluids. Or solids. I’ll just leave it at that.
Since I started in the winter, my rings have had a habit of slipping off my fingers, and gliding across the floors, onto the mediocre beige carpet. One time too many has a co-worker brought my thick, silver thumb ring to my attention lying on the carpet amidst primary colored toys and plush animals. And one too many times has this occurred in the infant room, the worst place a small object like my ring could land – in the midst of ignorant infants who will put any and every thing into their mouths, no matter what shape or size.
This has happened so often, either to my knowledge or unknown to me, that i fear the worst – the choking of an infant on my behalf. I’m constantly checking my hands to be sure that all is in place.
Number Two…or “another poem about this.”
When I think of you I’d
Like to think what we’ve been through
Has a huge effect on
How I think or how I write.
I spent too many days and nights
Trying to fight the affections I had
For something that never was.
I guess I can’t get past it because
It’s what began this journey for me –
A path that’s led me to be more of a who I am.
Empowered, I stand
With more focus on my goals.
More care for those with false hope.
More love on those
Who have always been there.
When I think about it, its really not fair
That out of our ashes, strength took hold of my hand,
While you were left with nothing but
Fears that you’d never be the man
Someone like me deserved to be loved by.
Gone are the moments when I think of you and
Ask God, “Why?”
💙 Mishy 🦋