monday night thoughts.

There is truly a lot going on in my mind right now.

I was reading The Best Yes by Lysa TerKreust on Sunday (for those of you who missed it, it’s now part of my weekly reading series), and I became super convicted about the way I spend my time. Sure, most of it is spent either working, sleeping, or eating, but when I have free time, what do I do?

Nowadays, I set aside time to read, and I definitely set aside time to blog, but the rest of it? Either hanging out with friends, or catching up on my TV shows (because I watch a lot of shows. Way more than I thought I did.). Not saying that any of these things are bad, but when I think of the things I want to pursue – why don’t I focus my time and energy into those things?

TerKreust also talks about the “soul thing” – something that you really feel called to do. One of those things for me is writing, and I have felt this call since I was in middle school. Right now, I feel like I’m accomplishing it the best that I can with the time I’ve had recently, although I realize that I could spend more hours working on other outlets for my visions of writing.

I’ve also considered starting my own YouTube channel. Ever since my best friend Bria and I had to put our music-based YouTube channel Kicks and Skittles on major hiatus because of her move to California, we’ve both been missing it and craving to start it back up again. My channel wouldn’t be music-based (I couldn’t go on without my bestie), but it would be more of a weekly lifestyle vlog.

Mentioning this idea to a few friends, and hearing their positive feedback has got me feeling confident that I will start the channel in the near future, possibly soon.

But I’m also discouraged because through the last move I’ve made, I’ve somehow lost my camera battery charger, and I can’t help but feel frustrated at myself for losing something so important to my creativity and to my work. Like I’m totally at a loss as to where it could be, and I’m less  than enthusiastic about having to buy a new one.

Honestly, my mind is also on the end of this week already because I’m ready to be in Nashville with two of my most favorite bros ever, and I would just like this week to fast-forward somehow, if possible haha.

But I know that my time is precious; me sitting here writing this post, somehow it will be worth it later. My normal, worrisome-self is more than concerned about my camera charger, but I know that in the end, it’s just a thing, and things can be replaced. Even though I don’t feel like spending money on replacing this thing, money isn’t everything either. Yes, I still need it to pay bills, but it’s still not something to worry or stress over.

As silly as this sounds, I also need to remind myself that just because I can’t find my charger doesn’t mean I wasn’t meant to start a YouTube channel. It’s crazy where our minds take us when something so small can create worry, fear, and doubt in our minds.

And even though I would rather it be the weekend so I could be in Nashville right now, this week has barely begun, and I can’t wish it away because I wont get these days and hours back. I need to make the most of them in whatever ways I can.

So, I hope that if you’re in any of these types of situations where time doesn’t seem to important, or maybe you’re using your time for things that aren’t as important when you should be using it for your “soul thing.” Or maybe you’re worried about trying to find something, or reaching out to a person, or whether you’ll have enough money for rent this month.

You’re not alone.

The Lord tells us to cast our cares on Him because He cares for us. And yes, that means He does care about you losing a camera battery charger, although in the grand scheme of things, it is minimal. I can’t tell you all how many times I’ve lost something, and I prayed about it, and asked God to help me find it, and I ended up finding it. I’m not trying to be cheesy; I’m so serious right now.

Whether you’re concerned about how you’re spending your time or money, or whether your worries are about other things, take heart. The week has just begun. You are still alive and well. And God’s not finished with you yet.

My stepmom always told me this when I was worried: “The Lord will perfect the things which concern you.”

And I believe He will.


πŸ’™ Mishy πŸ¦‹


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