I hope this blog post finds you well. Because, congratulations, you made it to the weekend!!!!
For some reason, my heart is just not in writing the #ObjectsTellTales series right now. Maybe I’ll continue it again sometime soon, but for now, I’m just feeling some type of way. My heart has just been feeling led towards something else.
Honestly for the past couple of days, I’ve been wondering where I’m going with all this writing. I keep explaining to people what I want to accomplish, what my vision is, and I’ve been getting really discouraged because their reactions haven’t been super enthusiastic, or what I want them to be.Some people give me the, “Hmm, that’s interesting,” or they just nod their head. Or I do get an initial excited reaction when I tell them the big picture of what I want to do, and then when I explain the details or a vague plan of how I intend to get there, it seems they lose interest, or they don’t seem convinced that I’ll ever make it.
And that’s just really discouraging, you know? To share with someone your vision of a dream you want to pursue, and them just sort of brush it aside. It’s not only discouraging, but it flat out hurts too.
I also think it hurts even more, and can be super scary when you yourself don’t know if what you’re dreaming of doing is something you’re sure of. Like, am I the only one sitting here, wondering if what I plan on doing is what I’m supposed to be doing? Surely, I have a passion and desire for it, but is it what I’m called to do?
That’s just a major question I’ve been thinking about lately. Because honestly, I just want to do what the Lord has called me to do, and I don’t want to take any steps toward my dreams if they aren’t His too. I’m scared that I’ll fall away from my true purpose if I start making moves, but I know that waiting around in fear just because things aren’t clear right now is useless.
Which is why I’m straying away from the #ObjectsTellTales series right now. At least, I think that’s why I’m doing it. Maybe it’s because I’m bored of it, or it’s because I just feel this pull to write on the things that are really on my heart right now, hoping that there’s someone else out there feeling the same way. I don’t know.
I just feel like I’m wavering right now, and I want to begin something, this idea that has been sitting on my heart and mind for a couple of weeks now, but I just haven’t had the time or courage to step up and truly begin the process of making it happen. I don’t want to be wrong, but I guess on the off-chance I’m right, I’m scared that it won’t be what I was hoping it would be.
But I know that the Lord knows my heart, and knows that my desire is to be used by Him in some way, particularly in writing.
I’m still reading Uninvited by Lysa TerKreust (I know it’s been a long time since I started it, but I’m trying to savor every chapter of this book because it’s THAT good!), and there was a series of prayers in the chapter I was reading that were based off of Psalm 91. One specific prayer just perfectly explained how my heart has been feeling recently…
“Lord, I trust You.
With every hope for my future and with every desire of my heart, I trust You, Lord. I trust You because You have a perfect plan with flawless timing already mapped out. I don’t need to figure it out. I just need to stay close to You. Each day You will show me what steps to take. You will guide me toward Your best. …”
Like, that is the cry of my heart right now, y’all. And I hope that those of you who also feel sort of lost in whatever dreams or passions you want to pursue can rest in the Lord, and be fearless in doing what needs to be done. He will guide you where you need to be so long as you move and trust that He knows what He’s doing.
So with this in mind I say that I’ll be moving forward with this process as I continue to blog every day for you guys. Maybe later as I get deeper into the process of this new project, I’ll reveal to you what it is. But for now, baby steps.
Happy Friday, happy weekend! I pray rest and peace over you all now, in Jesus’ Name.
💙 Mishy 🦋