I know that the title of this post is something we all probably see smacked onto cups, shirts, bags, etc. But I've honestly been needing good vibes after a couple of weeks of the things I've seen and heard.
I'm not here to point fingers or call out names, I'm here to just address the fact that the negativity has reached its peek for me, and I'm tired of having it around. I've read way too much bashing, and not enough kind comments. People are constantly talking about one another – one person will talk about someone, and then go to someone else to talk about the person they just talked to.
It's honestly all drained me, and made me think about a lot of things within this realm…
All the negativity has me looking inward. I know I'm not perfect; as positive and encouraging as I am to the outside world most of the time, I have my moments, trust me. And I'm not proud of those moments in which I indulge in gossip, or eagerly await to hear the rumors about someone else. I'm not happy to say that I've sat in silence, and just listened to all of the negative discussions, instead of speaking up and addressing the fact that maybe things shouldn't be said or talked about.
I've realized it's not enough to be silent, and just stand around while the people around me are talking negatively. Because I'm still listening to the negativity; it gets into my mind, and before I know it, I'm thinking, saying, and doing the things I didn't want to think, say, or do. And because it affects me, if I continue it, it will affect those around me.
Honestly, a lot of the negativity I had been seeing was on social media, and I started to drift away from checking my socials often because I realized how much I was being affected by all of it. It's another reason why I stopped going on social media on Sundays – to have a day away from checking up on everyone else's lives, and potentially feeding off of and into the negativity I was seeing.
Pick a Side
I was seeing a lot of people who follow me and even each other talk badly about one another, and it made me so uncomfortable because we're all supposed to be on the same team. There shouldn't be an "us vs. them" or "me vs. her or him" mentality; we are all human, we are all wanting to get somewhere in life, and we are all connected to each other somehow, maybe by interest or people or location.
All of the negative talk also put me in this terrible position – I felt like I had to take a side. I either had to agree that "yes, this person was being this way," or "no, I don't think this person is like that," and this sort of dilemma is why I simply stayed silent. But again, even in silence, what I was hearing/seeing/reading was still affecting me. I began to take what some people said as gospel instead of questioning what was being said with questions such as:
Was what was being said true?
Was this person in a specific type of situation for them to act in the way being portrayed by the speaker?
How would this person feel if they were to hear what was being said about them?
the way in which I viewed the people being talked about, or the people doing the talking.
I Love You…I Love You Not…
By listening to and participating in the negative talking about others, or to others, my perspective of people began to be tainted by all of the things being said, and overall, it was affecting the way I loved on people, despite those things. And it's unfortunate because the things being said may not have been true, yet I used them as a measurement on whether I showed someone love or not.
Now, this isn't to say that I've totally blocked people, and have deemed them all horrible human beings for smack-talking each other. I am including myself as a person who smack-talks, and I say it with shame.
But I do want to address it because I'm tired of all of the negativity. Everyone says, posts, and supports "Good Vibes Only," but are we actually willing to be a part of what that actually means?
It means we love each other the best we can without trying to stir the pot (even though it may be fun sometimes. I didn't say spreading around negativity was boring; it happens for a reason). It means instead of tearing each other down, we're building each other up, encouraging each other in the things we're each pursuing, and embracing the differences we each have, because not one person is the same. Sure, there may be some similarities in some things, but each person is a unique human being who needs to be treated with some respect.
I'm not saying throw out some fake love; don't say or do anything that you don't genuinely mean. But it does mean that, if you have the opportunity to bash someone else, you choose not to do so. Maybe instead of staying silent while someone you know or sort of know is being talked about, you stand up for that person, and ask the speaker some hard questions about what is being said. I'm not saying throw hate on the speaker either; I'm saying, ask questions that will make them think about what they're saying.
It's hard and I know it is, because I have a hard time choosing the high road of not spreading the negativity.
But I just encourage myself and all of us to seriously spread the good vibes – be a positive light in the conversations you have. If you're tempted to talk bad about someone, think of one good thing about that person instead, and genuinely mean it.
Think about what you're saying before you say it.
Place yourself in the shoes of the person you're wanting to talk about – how would you feel if the things you were about to say were said about you? A lot of this just goes back to the major "Golden Rule" – "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
So yeah, that was just something that's been weighing on my heart lately, and I hope that my thoughts were able to make you think about where you are within the realm of good vibes and negative talk. We've all done it at some point, and we can't change that. What we can change is our reaction the next time the opportunity to speak negatively presents itself.
#MishyWrites #TruthPrevails 🦋✨